Well, folks. It was fun while it lasted.

As you can see, not much has been happening on this blog lately.

There are several reasons for this, but I will only hit on a couple:

First: It's amazing how much can change in a couple of months--both in our personal lives and on the writing front. A couple of us have signed publishing contracts, and so the need to write, edit, market, promote HAD to take preference over this blog and the services we were providing.

Second: Running this blog, critiquing submissions, providing feedback...well, that's a LOT of dang work. We weren't getting paid for this service. We had a concept and we went with it--for free--not realizing how much time it would involve with very little (nothing) in return for our effort.

Third: Probably the biggest factor that made us come to this decision, was the fact that a good portion of the submissions we received just weren't ready. They needed more revision. We were wanting to give out reviews on AMAZING, fully complete, well edited novels. 90% of what we received didn't come close.

So we've shut it down. We've moved on.

If you liked our comments and our posts, you can check us out on our individual blogs:

Angela Scott: www.whimsywritingandreading.weebly.com or @whimsywriting on twitter or http://www.facebook.com/AngelaScottWriter

D.S. Tracy:

Kacey Mark:

Showing posts with label Adverbs are bad. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Adverbs are bad. Show all posts

Wednesday, July 6, 2011

Picky Hook'ers & Mistakes to Avoid in Your First Five Pages

Posted by Ready, Aim, Hook Me at 6:17 AM 2 comments
As I’ve mentioned before in an earlier blog post, we’re rejecting a lot of submissions. They’re just not hooking us. The first five pages should snare us, wet our appetite, and have us begging for more, but it just isn’t happening as much as we'd like. 

Are we too mean and picky? Maybe.
Should we relax our standards? Never.

Most agents ask for the query, the synopsis, and a “taste” of your work. Did you know that most agents, after reading the query, skip right to the sample pages? For the most part they could care less about the synopsis or plot of your story. They want to see what your writing style is like. They can get a good sense of who you are and what you have to offer—everything they need to know about you as a writer can be found in those first few pages of your novel. Then, and only then, if they like what they see will they take a look at the synopsis to determine if your story idea is intriguing, new, and fresh, something they want to represent. 

Oh, those first few pages! They can make or break you. It doesn’t seem fair, does it? But agents are busy people. Editors even more so. And Hook’ers are no exception either. 

So, just to give you an idea of what things we’re seeing that tend to cause us to say no (things you hopefully can avoid), I’ve compiled the following list: 

1)      1) Stories starting in the wrong place. Get us into the meat of the story right away. If you start your novel with too much backstory and setup, then we will pass. 

2)       2) Clichéd beginnings. Examples: (YA) The female/male main character comes to school and sees a new kid (girl/boy) in the office registering for classes (I can count on both hands the instances of stories starting off that same or similar way—Twilight, I Am Number Four . . .).  For romance, any type of romance, the opening starts off with the female main character jogging. Enough said. For some reason, female characters must be joggers, because, it’s only through jogging that they happen to come across the main male character (vampire, sexy alien, werewolf, super buff dude). 

3)       3) Starting off with a pretty cool hook/opening line, but then dropping it and never coming back to it. There have been a couple submissions in which that opening sentence was like wow, I need to read more. But then the story takes off in a different direction and leaving us feeling confused and mislead. 

4)       4) Too many modifiers.  The over use of adverbs, adjectives, and metaphors. (You know how much I dislike adverbs). 

5)       5) The cadence or sound of the novel reads funny.  Try reading your words out loud. Listen to the beat of the words as you say them. Even though they are written, they do need to have a smooth flow.

6)       6) Too much stage direction. You don’t have to tell the reader EVERYTHING the character is doing. It’s okay to end dialogue with simply “he said”. That’s good. Some narrative is great and appreciated. It breaks up the use of dialogue tags. But TOO many can be jarring. Find a balance. 

7)    7) Not having a clean submission. I’m not talking dirty, gritty words here (Hook’ers can handle it), what I mean is that the manuscript has either punctuation problems, or margin issues, or copy/crossover over issues.  Now, we don’t always reject simply because there is a misspelled word or two, or the margins are slightly off. We reject when there are too many and it tosses us out of the story too often. Anything that tosses the reader out of the story isn’t a good thing. You want to avoid that as much as possible. 

If you can avoid doing the above, then you will be in a much better position to be accepted by Hook’ers and agents alike. Polish and refine, peeps. Polish and refine.  Do some research and continue to improve yourself. Set yourself up for success.

Oh, and if you want to read a great book on how to make the first pages of your manuscript shine, check out The First Five Pages: The Writer’s Guide to Staying Out of theRejection Pile by Noah Lukeman. If you don’t have this book in your writer’s library, I highly suggest you do. It’s a great book to own.

Tuesday, June 28, 2011

Just Say NO to Adverbs

Posted by Ready, Aim, Hook Me at 11:28 PM 4 comments

Ode to Adverbs by Angela Scott, the Reluctant Hook'er

Erase it! Delete its lowly existence.
Eradicate the ghastly adverb!
Beg for writerly repentance!

One goes easily unnoticed, forgivable.
But more cripples the senses.
They stab me deeply in my critic’s eye
Like lowly white picket fences.

They unleash my critic’s fiery tongue,
And I abhor the writer of such prose.
I hate the use of adverbs, you twit!
I thumb at you my nose.

Erase them, I plead of you.
Nothing good can be drawn from their use.
To write with unnecessary adverbs
Only tightens your newbie noose.

I have used several here,
An example to make a visionary point.
Adverbs are purely unnecessary
They only sadly disappoint.

Should you continue to write them,
And ignore my witty, yet insightful, ode.
Then it’s off with your head
For you’ve broken the Stephen King code!


Oh, my goodness! I write this stupid little poem in response to a book I just picked up (and subsequently sat back down) this morning. The over use of adverbs just about KILLED me. I kid you not.

On page 3 of the novel that shall remain nameless, I counted twelve adverbs: gravely, absently, delicately, calmly, pensively, firmly, lightly, ominously, deadly, quickly, sightlessly, silently. 

Twelve! Twelve feakin' adverbs!

Ummmm . . . BOOM! (Head explodes).

That is pure insanity right there. The sad thing, this is a published book through a publishing house (albeit a small publisher, but still). What the heck? Where was the editor? Why didn’t someone say, “What the *bleep* are you doing here? Erase those you fool!” 

Adverbs are a nasty thing. Just nasty. I’m not the only one who thinks this way either.

David Weedmark had this to say about adverbs, “Basically, in my opinion, any book with more than one adverb per page should have every adverb cut out, and then stapled to the author’s fingers.”

Extreme? Yes. And though I’m not a violent kind of gal, I’m thinking this could be a useful tactic in eradicating adverbs, the majority of them anyway, from novel pages.  I mean, who doesn't know that adverbs suck and should be used at a minimum? Where had this writer been hiding? Jeez. Poor lady.

Stephen King, in his book On Writing, said the following, “ Adverbs are not your friends . . . Adverbs seem to have been created with the timid writer in mind . . . To put it another way, they’re like dandelions. If you have one in your yard, it looks pretty and unique. If you fail to root it out, however, you find five the next day . . . fifty the day after that . . . and then , my brothers and sisters, your lawn is totally, completely, and profligately covered with dandelions.”

Adverbs only “try” to beef up weak verbs, but fail in almost every case. It’s that simple. There’s really no usefulness to them (feel free to debate me on this if you like). But, once adverbs are eliminated and replaced with strong action verbs, the response to your writing will be incredible. I promise you this. It will not jar the reader out of the story, AND it will allow the reader to invest more of themselves into your fictional world. Isn’t that what every writer wants? I would hope so.

As for this poor author, I feel for her. I tried to give her the benefit of the doubt and continued to read a little more of her novel, but the adverbs, even after page three, were thick and torturous. I just couldn't do it. I couldn't read any more. It hurts too much. She may have had a great story and concept, but the adverbs destroyed her novel. (To be fair, this was NOT a submission to our site for review. This was a book I won, myself, through a blogfest).

Don't let adverbs destroy your work. Just say no. 

Okay, I thought a writing exercise for you might be fun (no boo’s, it totally could be).

I’d love to see how many adverbs you can jam into a 100 word paragraph. Let’s take the adverbs we so desperately want to use in our novels, but know we won’t because it’s against the law—the Stephen King law—and cram them into a paragraph as a way of saying goodbye to weak verbs for forever and HELLO to strong verbs from now on.

Go ahead and give it a try. Be creative. Who knows, there might be a prize involved. *Nods head and raises brows* There totally could be.

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